Year of first diagnosis: 2007
Kind of cancer: Lung
My mind races as I sit here thinking of the time I was told I had cancer. I went numb all over. My heart skipped a beat. I felt so afraid. Being a positive person, I knew I would fight hard. The first step was to see my chemo doctor who let me know what would happen the next four months. He also told me my hair would fall out. I just rolled my eyes and said, “So what! That means no bad hair days!”I am sure my positive attitude and sense of humor were a big part of staying on top of it. Having Gary, my husband, there for me, plus my daughter, Tina, from start to finish were big blessings.
The chemo made me so sick. It took a lot from them to care for my needs. I began getting cards in the mail. Wow – people cared. St. Theresa parish had Masses for me and many friends prayed the rosary often. It was like Jesus was there to help me carry my cross. I got very close to God. I learned very fast never to take anything or anyone for granted. God can change everything in seconds.
One of the times I was on the cancer floor and was feeling very depressed, and far from everyone including God, Sister Sue Tracy OP came to my room. She pulled up a chair and talked with me. She gave my holy communion and as she softly sang to me, I felt tears rolling down my face as I once again felt God’s presence. I knew then I was back one on one with God. When I came home Sister Sue came to see me and left me with “our” guardian angel which was a gift to her when she was going through the horrors of cancer.
Sister Sue also shared something her niece said to her, “Christ stands for the BIG C while cancer only stands for the little c.” Christ is much more powerful. I know now that God is with me always and I have learned to be thankful for my life and for every day that God gives me. I talk to Him often and it seems I am always thanking Him for something. Since cancer arrived I am closer to God than I ever was before. Once I got mad at God and asked Him, “God, why do you keep testing my faith in You?” The response came, “Do you not know I will always be grabbing your legs and be dragging behind you.” Then I told God I was sorry and began to cry.
Would I go through the horrors of my past again? OH YES!!! Cancer gave me the Best Friend I have – God! For anyone who may hear the words, “You have cancer”, please know that God has a plan for you. Fight hard. Stay strong in your faith. Keep a positive attitude and never lose your sense of humor. Above all – pray, pray, pray. Let God be your Best Friend too. Listen to Him. Talk to Him.